I haven’t written in several days. I have had thousands things to do. One of them is moving. Hopefully it will be better now in december.
Yesterday I went on the yearly christmas party my work arranges. This year it was supposed to be at the office, which was from the beginning a big dissapointment from the majority of my colleagues. A dissapointment which I could understand considering the places where the party has been before.
Even though the party was at the office I was asked to help the people that was arranging the party to help out before the party started. The thing was that I really really wish I didn’t had said yes to help out. It’s not because I have a problem with helping out. The problem was that I have had a rough week and the last thing I wanted to do yesterday was to party and even less to decorate an office. My week has been filled with stress and anxiety. So the last thing I want to do is to party. I hate to party when I don’t feel happy.
But, as I have learned, I kept my thoughts to myself, put a big smile on my face and tried my hardest to have a good time.
Sometime in the middle of the dinner I felt that the alcohol didn’t give me the positive feeling that I wish it would. Just as I’ve learned, the alcohol only enhances a feeling and can never replace one. If I have a bad feeling from the start it is difficult to reverse the trend. So sometime quite early at the evening when I saw people leaving I took the decision to also leave.
So never drink if you think the alcohol can make you happy. The alcohol will only make you happy when you already are.